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Someone! Hand me a guitar! NOW!

February 8, 2008

This is pretty amazing. You know the way Guitar Hero teaches you how to play a plastic guitar with coloured buttons, and if you pulled the plug out all you’d hear would be clicky clickclick click clickyclickclickclick and really, that’s the end of your musical career right there? Well Guitar Rising teaches you how to TOTALLY PLAY THE GUITAR! Holy shit, man! Do you know what that means? It means that if I start now, I might be able to form a completely bitchin’ band by the time I’m fifty!

Here’s how I see my career going.

Age………Progress
40………. Basic scales, or whatever they’re called.
41………. Most early Clash songs.
42………. Stairway to Heaven except for fiddly bit.
43………. Stairway to Heaven with fiddly bit.
44………. OK Computer except for fiddly bit.
45………. OK Computer
46………. Start writing my own songs. Already, there’s something really interesting there.
47………..Recruit other members. (Incl. girl on bass).
48………..Fire first drummer.
49………..Give away all my music for free.
50………..Declare bankruptcy.
51………..Attempt to get ‘It Crowd, The Musical’ off the ground. Beg Neil Hannon to do the songs.

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