Have at it!

Torture works!

Just to prove how much he hates violence, Michael Haneke has made Funny Games again. Because the message of his film is so important (watching people suffer is not entertainment, so here’s two hours of it), and because it’s so vital to get this across to as many people as possible, he’s done it with an all-star cast! So now you can watch Tim Roth cry for ten minutes without having to read the subtitles.

When a European does it, y’see, it’s not torture porn, it’s art. And when he does it again, it’s not a cynical cash-in, it’s… uhh, well, it’s something.

(Oh, and to all the critics who tricked me into sitting through to the end of ‘Hidden’? Thanks… thanks a bunch.)

Tom releases the hounds

According to this throwaway line in a Vanity Fair piece, Tom Cruise’s hobbies include intimidating doctors.

“…Spielberg felt the actor’s antics had hurt his own movie, 2005’s ‘War of the Worlds’. Far worse, though, had been an episode when Spielberg told Cruise the name of a doctor who had prescribed medication to a relative and the doctor’s office was subsequently picketed by Scientologists.”

Link (and here’s the original Vanity Fair piece)

More Larsony

Again, the use of the Larson third person does not prevent this joke from being a confusing mess.

“What Whitehead witnessed was disturbing….”

‘Noted Catholic author’ Kenneth Whitehead gets medieval on Father Ted’s ass.

“The second of the three priests depicted on the show, Father
Dougal, is quite deliberately presented as an uncomprehending simpleton, a
cheerful idiot. Father Dougal is the foil for Father Ted; he can always be
depended on to say the wrong thing and, on one occasion, he turns out not even
to know who the pope is. Such a person could never have gotten into, much less
out of, any seminary anywhere.”

Oops! Busted!

(Thanks, Notacrook!)

Update: I’m fond of the way every American seems to think the show is a case of British people making fun of Irish people. Even John Michael Higgens, who is supposedly playing Ted in the American remake, says here “you guys are doing an Irish joke”. The lack of interest in the story behind the show–in the fact, for instance, that it is written and directed by Irish people–is not a very good sign, to say the least

Well, it is a funny song.

A guy with autism  gets the giggles while singing the American National Anthem at a baseball match , and then everything turns lovely.

Free Bilal Hussein

Bilal Hussein, Pulitzer Prize-winning photographer and the latest victim of ‘regime change’ in Iraq.

“In the 19 months since he was picked up, Bilal has not been charged
with any crime, although the military has sent out a flurry of
ever-changing claims. Every claim we’ve checked out has proved to be
false, overblown or microscopic in significance. Now, suddenly, the
military plans to seek a criminal case against Bilal in the Iraqi court
system in just days. But the military won’t tell us what the charges
are, what evidence it will be submitting or even when the hearing will
be held.” Link

“All the characteristics of wine”

The news that Irish roads are soon to be free of drunken priests weaving from parish to parish while pickled on Communion Wine is met with concern by Father Brian D’Arcy.

“I don’t like to use the word wine, as it is Christ’s blood in the
Eucharist — but it still has all the characteristics of wine when in
the blood stream.”

Hmm, “all the characteristics of wine”…maybe that’s because it’s FUCKING WINE!

The money was just resting in my account.

“TWO Irish priests accused of misappropriating millions from a
Florida church had formed a mortgage company with another priest called Shag Inc.

Fr John Skehan (80), originally from Johnstown,
Kilkenny, and Fr Francis Guinan (64), originally from Birr, Co Offaly, are accused in relation to $8.6m missing from church coffers.

The two men are accused of using offertory dollars to keep girlfriends, take gambling excursions and foreign holidays, and buy property.”

Link

You beauties!

Well done, Australia! Another Bush flunky bites the dust!